1. Secret is in our mind
2. Cultivate unadulterated mind
3. Compassionate heart
4. Relaxation
5. Recreation
6. Cultivating patience

Is it a wish, myth or a fact that men reach their passionate prime at the age of 18 and women at 31? Is age nothing but a number? This is what some researchers have been trying to discover from time to time. During a survey, a group of women have come strongly against the thought that ‘age is just a number’ and calling it a delusion. They say such statements define them, shape them and influence what they do and how they do it. They proclaim, ‘whether one likes it or not, the date of birth of a person marks out until the day one dies’.

A UK based survey once claimed that a woman is most eye-catching when she is 31, but cynics commented that it should be wonderful news for young women who can rejoice when they are at their peak. Some may argue as to how anyone can presume to tell an entire gender when they will be at their most alluring?

Total vegetarian
This topic takes me back to an interview with a prominent Sri Lankan in London, the late Dixon Kotelawela, cousin of Sir John, one time Sri Lanka’s Prime Minister. Dixon was in his mid seventies, after recovering from a by-pass heart surgery he had become a total vegetarian, yet he looked quite virile and vigorous.

During the interview I ventured to find out the secret behind his hale and hearty looks at his age. Dixon in a very judicious manner quipped: “My dear fellow, it’s not the chronological age that counts but the functional “! Naturally, there and then it dawned on me that age factor hasn’t got to be the case!

Internal happiness
S Ramachandran, who writes to the Hindu newspaper, once commented how people feel despondent in thinking about their health, security aspects and age. His advice was not to bother about them bit offered a formula to remain young and healthy by understanding the basic principles of life and following them meticulously. There is an immeasurable difference between growing older and growing up. Growing older is mandatory whereas growing up is optional. The secret behind staying young is mainly in our mind. Some suggest to drink honey, Royal jelly or consume vitamin pills until you become an hypochondriac!

The basic attribute to remain ‘young looking’ would be to cultivate an unadulterated mind and a compassionate heart, relaxation and recreation are two supplementary forces that will help one to have a good sleep or listen to soothing music, spiritualists advice. How does one do it? For those whose hearts are impregnated with celestial fire it would be much easier to derive internal happiness being ‘spiritual’ and performing good deeds and helping others while not expecting reciprocative favours in return.

Quarrelling with others, ‘ flying off the handle’ frequently or envying others’ wellbeing will not bring any good. Cultivating patience and learning to forgive and forget will bring about an internal transformation automatically without one’s knowledge. At that state, a person’s heart will sparkle outside which will prompt others to say: “Well! You look so young looking! What is the secret and how do you do it”? Our face certainly is an evident mirror of our heart!

One’s ability to assimilate the inevitable impermanence in human life and train one’s mind to hit upon humour on a daily basis is supposed to help maintain one’s youthful appearance.

Bodily functions
Certainly one needs to have a dream in life because when one loses such a dream one naturally dies several times prior to the final call of death. That is why we see so many people today ‘who are dead’ in their mind and thought walking around and not even realising about this fact.

Our brain is the most powerful computer which controls all our bodily functions. So, if we can whip up the brain with a magic mantra like, ‘I am well, fit and young looking’ regularly, wise men advise us not to worry about the ‘chronological, biological, or psychological aspects in life.

Optimistic in attitude
As a supplement to mental exercises if one can pay heed to one’s eating habits too, along with regular physical exercises without always opting to be like a dormant bag of Samba rice and remain cheerful, positive and optimistic in attitude, the age factor can become a myth.

According to modern Western psychologists, the over 50’s are more likely to be at their sexual peak than half their age groups. One of the main reasons to their claim is that “men and women in the over 50 age group have more time and freedom than any previous generation and certainly they are not going to spend their time limited to only babysitting their grandchildren”.

Similar to’ mature wine’, they say, which is more rounded and full bodied,’ the yearning for intimacy is strong as between 50 and 70 year olds as it was at 30 - older you are, the more likely you are to have the skills and understanding to make life fulfilling.

Anyone can grow older, that doesn’t take any talent or ability but the idea should be to grow up by always finding opportunity in change. Have no regrets. If hearts are open we will always be in a cheerful mood which will reflect through our face. Then we do not have to fear when the death call comes as we all will realize that one day we have to leave this world.

We think that our spouse and children will be unable to withstand our loss. But the truth is no one is going to die for you; they may be depressed for some time. Time heals everything and they will carry on. So be cheerful, make hay while the sun shines and be ‘young’ all the time because you have never felt old within from the time of your birth!

tilakfernando@yahoo.co.uk