3 Easy Ways to Die :
Take a Cigar daily - You will die 10 years early.
Drink Rum daily - You will die 30 years early.
Love Someone Truly - You will die daily.

A foolish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.

One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption :
Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD
After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY

Three FASTEST means of Communication :
1. Tele-Phone
2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell to Woman
Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANYONE

Love your friends not their sisters. Love your sisters not their
friends.

A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman. Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
Moral : BE SPECIFIC