ADULTERY - The wrong people doing the right thing.

ALIMONY - The screwing you get for the screwing you got.

BABY - A hollow tube with a loud voice at one end and a complete lack of responsibility at the other end.

CHIVALRY - A mans inclination to defend a woman against every man but himself.

CONSCIENCE - That which hurts when everything else feels so good.

CONSTIPATION - To have and to hold.

DANCE - A Naval engagement without the loss of seamen.

DECOY - A flashlight in the pants pocket.

DIARY - Book of revelations.

DOCTOR - A lucky fellow who is privileged to undress women and go all over them without getting his face slapped.

ENEMA - A goose with a gush.

EXPLORATION - Beating around the bush.

FATHER'S DAY - Nine months before labor day.

GENTLEMAN - One who is always careful to rest at least half his weight on his elbows.

HORSE SHOW - A lot of horses showing their asses to a

CRETARY - A stenographer who watches her periods.

SIN - Anything the other fellow enjoys and you don't.