1) 3 wishes

Bob and Sam (both were 15) waiting for their school bus in the morning were chatting when Bob said "Last night i was in my bed when a ghost came into my room and told me i had 3 wishes." Sam in disbelief said what did you wish for." Then Bob said " Last night i screwed your mom your girlfriend and your sister."

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2) one for the ladies

MEN ARE ALWAYS WHINING ABOUT HOW WOMEN ARE SUFFOCATING THEM. PERSONALLY I THINK IF YOU CANE HEAR THE WHINING YOURE NOT PRESSING ON THE PILLOW HARD ENOUGH.