A few days ago, I overheard my small grandson doing his airthmetic homework. Three plus one, the son of a bitch is four," he was saying. "Three plus two, the son of a bitch is five. Three plus three, the son of a bitch is six." And so on. Horrified, I asked him where on earth he had picked up that language. "Oh, that's the way they teach us at school," he replied. The following day I went to see his teacher and asked her about it. At first she was equally horrified, then her face broke into a grin. "I get it!" she cried. "We teach the children to say "Tree plus one, THE SUM OF WHICH IS FOUR." Three plus is two, the sum of which is five."---F.H

The teacher wrote on the blackboard: "I ain't had no fun all summer." Then she aked a youngster in the front now: "Harry, what should I do to correct that?" Meybe---get a boy friend?" he suggested helpfully.

DEFINITIONS:

Meterologist: A man who can look into a girl's eyes and tell whether.

Mal de mer: French for "you can't take it with you."

Intuition: The strange instinct that tells a woman she it right, whether she is not.

Television: Radio with eyestrain.