How can you find Ronald McDonald at a nude beach?
He's the one with the sesame seed buns!

What's the last thing a drummer says to his band members?
"Hey guys I wrote a song!"

What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing, they just waved.

What do you call a dog with no hind legs and steel testicles?
"Sparky"

What do you call a man who has lost 99% of his brain?
A widower.

When is a car not a car?
When it turns into a driveway.

What do you call two indians on a bike?
Organized crime.

How do you make a handkerchief dance?
Put a little boogie in it.

Why does a milking stool have only 3 legs?
Because the cow has the utter.

What do you call a guy who sticks his right arm in a shark's mouth?
Lefty!

How does a high school boy propose marriage?
"You're having a what?!?"

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown?
Does this taste funny to you?

Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshiper?
He sold his soul to Santa!

What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.

What's the difference between broccoli and boogers?
Kids won't eat broccoli.

How can you tell if a groom is Polish?
He would be the one with the clean bowling shirt.

What bowl can you wash thousands of times, but it's still not clean enough
to eat out of?
A toilet bowl!

Everyday for quite a while a young boy brought raisins to his teacher,
until one day he suddenly stopped bringing them.

After a few days without raisins the teacher was curious and asked why he
had stopped, and he replied:

"I'm sorry. My rabbit died."

How are a chicken and a grape alike?
They are both purple... except for the chicken.

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a cold one. The bartender gives it to
him and says "that'll be $25." A minute later the bartender is making
conversation and says, "Ya know, we don't get many gorillas round these
parts."

The gorilla replies, "At those prices I'm not surprised."

Why do bees hum?
Because they don't know the words!

Where does a general keep his army?
In his sleevy.

A horse enters a bar and walks over to the bartender, the bartender looks
at the horse and says, hey buddy, why the long face?

How do you catch a unique animal?
Unique up on him!

Why did the wagon train have to stop in the desert?
Because it was having "injun" trouble!

You can visit my home page at:
http://www.myna.com/~abdul/main.html