To: Yo mama jokers(part 1)
Posted by The Ugly Mama on February 24, 1998 at 06:18:30:

Dear Jokers who provide Yo mama jokes,

Please do not post yo mama jokes previously posted in this Joke Page.
It's a waste of your time, our time and bandwith.

Please read the following collection of YO MAMA SO UGLY' jokes. Future
jokers, read this and if you can find something new about the ugly mama
then submit your joke. (OLD MAMA,FAT MAMA, TALL MAMA, POOR
MAMA etc. will follow)

YO MAMA IS SO UGLY

Yo mama so ugly I can fuck her in any position and its still doggy style.
Yo mama so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.
Yo mama so ugly I saved her life by killing a shit-eating dog on the way over.
Yo mama so ugly Ted Dansen wouldn't date her!
Yo mama so ugly The NHL banned her for life
Yo mama so ugly condom advocates wanted to use her as a poster child.
Yo mama so ugly even Freddy Krueger has nightmares of her.
Yo mama so ugly even Rice Krispies won't talk to her!
Yo mama so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone!
Yo mama so ugly her American Express card left home without her.
Yo mama so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her
Yo mama so ugly her mom had to feed her with a slingshot.
Yo mama so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck so the dogs would play with her.
Yo mama so ugly her parents first named her "Accident".
Yo mama so ugly her picture is on the inside of a Roach Motel.
Yo mama so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck
Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."
Yo mama so ugly on Halloween, people go as her.
Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.
Yo mama so ugly she is very successful at her job: Being a scarecrow
Yo mama so ugly she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning.
Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and gets arrested!
Yo mama so ugly she made an onion cry.
Yo mama so ugly she makes blind kids cry.
Yo mama so ugly she makes me wish birth control is retroactive.
Yo mama so ugly she must've been born on the freeway -- that's where most accidents happen.
Yo mama so ugly she scares the roaches away.
Yo mama so ugly she took your dog to the Canine Show and won ... your dog came in second.
Yo mama so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out!
Yo mama so ugly she turned Medusa to stone!
Yo mama so ugly she went into an hunted house and came out with an application
Yo mama so ugly she went to get her nose pierced & got stabbed in the ass!
Yo mama so ugly she's got little circles all over her body from people touching her with 10-foot poles.
Yo mama so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.
Yo mama so ugly that she scared the shit out of the toilet.
Yo mama so ugly that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her.
Yo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.
Yo mama so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
Yo mama so ugly the last time she heard a whistle was when she got hit by a train.
Yo mama so ugly the prince would rather live as a frog than kiss her.
Yo mama so ugly the psychiatrist makes her lie face-down.
Yo mama so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.
Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower.
Yo mama so ugly they knew what time she was born, because her face stopped the clock!
Yo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.
Yo mama so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.
Yo mama so ugly they put her face on box of Ex-Lax and sold it empty.
Yo mama so ugly they put her in the monkey cage to make the monkeys stop jacking off.
Yo mama so ugly when I see her, she reminds me of Taco Bell -- Run for the Border!
Yo mama so ugly when I took her to the zoo, a guy at the door said, "Thanks for bringing her back."
Yo mama so ugly when a cop asked for her drivers license he arrested her for carrying a concealed weapon.
Yo mama so ugly when she gets up, the sun goes down.
Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."
Yo mama so ugly when she looks in the mirror, her pimples popped back in.
Yo mama so ugly when she passes by your bathroom, the toilet flushes.
Yo mama so ugly when she threw a boomerang, it wouldn't come back.
Yo mama so ugly when she walked into a haunted house, she came out with a paycheck.
Yo mama so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say "Damn, is it Halloween already?"
Yo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras
Yo mama so ugly when she was born the doctor took a look at her and spanked her parents.
Yo mama so ugly when she was born, the doctor slapped the wrong end.
Yo mama so ugly when she was born, they put her in an incubator with tinted windows.
Yo mama so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours... for a quote!
Yo mama so ugly your dad's breath smells like shit because he would rather kiss her ass.



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